Tin Tin in Vietnam

We had yesterday off from placement because all of the new volunteers were arriving, so I went back to Hoi An with Melissa and Rebecca (the Australian girls who have been here) a new girl named Olivia (also from Australia), and a new girl named Faye (Australia, too). It was hot and beautiful outside and we walked around, had some good coffee, did a little shopping, and had lunch at the restaurant owned by the woman who taught our cooking class. My shopping included going to a store called Reaching Out which is a fair trade shop ran by artists and people with different abilities. Its lovely and I got almost all of my shopping for friends and family done there. I also spent a good amount of time, withe Olivia's help, bargaining with a street vendor for different Tin Tin in Vietnam shirts. After lunch we headed back to Hoi An to teach English at Social Support.

I will be taking over Rebecca's english class for the next two weeks. She has three 14 year old students who are very sweet and very cheeky. I'm looking forward to it. I visited the baby room while I was there and was upset to find that Hoi is not feeling well. He was crying and very warm when I got there and having a hard time soothing himself. We're hoping that the chair we've gotten him will help because right now he is so weak that he is not able to sit up or move around at all on his own, so he spends the majority of his time lying on his back which is not good for his health. With the chair, the nurse mothers will be able to take him out and leave him in the chair for a while when we are not there and that should help him. I want a lot for Hoi as well as the other children at social support, but I'm beginning to really see that with these children there just isn't the opportunity and time for the one on one they really need. The nurse mothers have a lot to care for so there is no way they can be holding Hoi all the time. Even the not disabled children and walking and talking later then those that I am familiar with from home because they do not have the support and help of parents.

I wish there were more people here helping and I really wish that I could stay longer. I'm starting to feel really upset at the aspect of leaving here in less than two weeks. There is so much more I want to do and I hate the idea of not being able to see the children and help first hand. A month is no where near long enough. I will leave and there will be another turn over and the English classes will get another new teacher and Tam will have another new tutor. All of the volunteers are great, and I am sure whoever takes over for our group will be wonderful, but I still want more time. I can come back next Christmas, but that will still only be for a month and that is 12 months away. I think the summer? Southeast Asia is very far away. If only I could just bring them all back to the US.

Its not a bad feeling but not really a good one either that I am feeling right now. I am apprehensive and want there to be more time. I have a new drive and I want to be back in school so that I can finish and get to the part of my life that allows me to travel and institute the work I believe in, but at the same time I wish I could just put everything on hold for 6 months and stay here. I guess that's not entirely true either, though, because I constantly feel like there is much more I could be doing here if I had more of my education behind me. I really want to give these people the actual medical attention that they need. What we're doing now is wonderful and nice, but the actual impact will come when I am able to be here as a medical doctor. 

I am happy and more relaxed in my life than I think I ever have been, but I am also soberingly aware of the work I have cut out for me over the next few years. There were many things I expected from this trip, but the one I am definitely the most welcoming and grateful to is the drive it has put in me and the compassion, yearning, and consideration for the world that it has so over-flowingly given me. I have nothing to gripe about and a life to look forward to.

My dad said in an e-mail to me that he 'suspects my patience for whining and self-indulgence are reaching a life-time low' and he is absolutely right. I have been fortunate to always have enough in my life. What I have viewed as difficult and written off as hard work is most of the worlds standard and my norm comes with benefits that qualify as very privileged. 

I am also growingly appreciate of my parents and the values they have instilled in me and my siblings. So, thank you mom and dad. Your support and benevolence means more to me than you can realize. Your priorities were right.

I don't have many pictures from yesterday, just one from a delicious coffee and pastry shop and a few of the market and river in Hoi An. 

I hope all is well on the other side of the world.